lilyinwater

Death, be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadful, for thou are not so;
For those whom thou think'st thou dost overthrow
Die not, poor Death, nor yet canst thou kill me.
From rest and sleep, which but thy pictures be,
Much pleasure; then from thee much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee do go,
Rest of their bones, and soul's delivery.
Thou'art slave to fate, chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poison, war, and sickness dwell,
And poppy'or charms can make us sleep as well
And better than thy stroke; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleep past, we wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; Death, thou shalt die.

John Donne


Another chapter closes.  Another opens.  Each year marks a private celebration.  
"Death, nor yet canst thou kill me."
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So, it starts pretty simple:  my youngest son bounds through the front door (scaring me and all the other occupants of my humble household half to death) with this bizarre looking log in his hands.  "MOM!" hollering at the top of his lungs as he bellows out my call-sign before taking notice that I was only a few feet away.  He was sweaty, hair matted to his little forehead and stinky like any 11 year old boy would be after playing in god knows what for a few hours after school yesterday.  "Oh lawdy, what now?" mumbling as I make my way over to investigate the source of the jubilation that just oozes out of his every pore.  "What the heck is THAT?" I ask to which he replies, "I dunno … but isn't it coooool?"

Hmm.  Not knowing what "it" is and bringing "it" INTO the house is usually not a good thing.  The object in question was almost the size and weight of two bricks and the color of a brick mixed in with some pretty Georgia red clay and what appeared to be … salt.  The weird thing was it was a wrapped rock.  Yes.  It was wrapped in some sort of protective plastic and for a minute, I was wondering about the obvious.  "Where did you get this thing?" I asked while taking it from the clutches of my proud little miner (street scavenger) and inspecting it carefully.  "It was in the middle of the road," he replied.   Yeah right.  

I am not a geologist nor a gemologist BUT for a minute there, I was kind of excited that he had found some treasure.  And I was really thankful the thing was not moving, bleeding or needing a home because bugs, injured critters and strays seem to be all the rage with little boys.  So, we made our way into the kitchen and cut the plastic off and ran it under some water for a while just because it seemed like the thing to do.  It was dusty and I think water goes with everything in my kitchen.  Fires are common, but that is another story.   Moving along, we QUICKLY discovered it was, in fact, some sort of degradable substance since it melted (?) a little bit while we were giving it a bath.  "Interesting" and "STOP!" were the two words being shared the most.  I was finding the whole event rather interesting and my son was begging me to stop messing with his rock.  I was winning.  Anyway, the thing was patted dry and set aside so we could do a little research.  And guess what?  It WAS salt but not just any old regular salt.

Lemmie back up a tiny bit.

The neighborhood I live in has seen a huge construction boom in the last little while.  Craftsmen of all types have been in and out of the area building and playing in their oversized Tonka trucks while the rest of civilization goes on about its business.  After my son found this wrapped rock (no joke … it was wrapped) and after searching the web for answers, we learned something cool.  And we also learned that we are apparently way behind on both culinary chic and artsy-fartsy construction.  Freaking rich neighbors.   Anywaaaay ….

Wondering what this thing was?  Try this:  Himalayan Salt.  Yes!  I can see some vibrant soul climbing to the highest peaks in the Himalayas to stake claim, absorb the view and … collect salt???  Huh?  Oh wait … I am getting distracted by another vision.  Amazing how the mind takes frequent breaks and blends multiple thoughts together at once.  Back to the story!  Seems one of my goofy neighbors lost their salt on the way home and my darling little boy found it and brought it home to mommy.  Well, he brought it home for himself but I confiscated it after much debate.  Muahahaha!  Click if you want to see what I am talking about.  Our rock looks like this www.atthemeadow.com/shop/index… and it is heavy.  Wonder if it would make cool lick-able necklace/pendant that folks could wear during endurance races or something … for salt replenishment, maybe!?  What can I say?  I have a very hyperactive imagination!

As it turns out, this sort of salt is used in kitchens to present and serve food on AND it is used in construction of foofoo fancy structures.  Right now, our salt block is drying out and knowing my skill in the kitchen, it will probably become a fixture in the garden.  Hmm.  Probably not a good idea either.  Okay, I will give it back to the child and he can use it as a bookend in his room.  

There are few things in life that bring me true inner peace and a reason to smile.  Sometimes, it is something as simple as a long, easy walk around the neighborhood, an hour of playing my violin without distraction or interruption or listening to my kids share their perspective on life.  For the most part, though, I am in constant motion and my mind never seems to rest so it is important to me and for me to break away and take a little time to do some reflection and deep breathing for the sake of my sanity.  

Late last night, after getting all the critters settled (that would be code for 'family') I decided to sit on my back porch in the twilight evening bliss and just breathe.  Just be.  My body perched comfortably in our typical Southern-style swing, feet dangling as I rocked to and fro, I closed my eyes and took a deep cleansing breath.  Ahhhh!  Peace and quiet.  Well, kind of.

So there I am, seemingly alone in my moment (it was dark out except for a faint glow coming from the cloud-covered moon) and what do I hear?  Hmm.  Something is close and getting closer.  Naturally, I froze the breath I had just inhaled and carefully brought the gentle sway to a grinding halt as I waited … and wondered what could possibly be lurking in the shadows of my yard.  

My head turns ever-so-slightly and out of the corner of my eye, I spot a small but rather bold creature who is casually strolling over the grass and edging its way towards me.  Holy mother of god!  What is it? Yes, those are the words that were being screamed inside the crowded confines of my busy mind.  So much for peace and quiet, right?  Anyway, I watch and strain my eyes to confirm the status and stature of the intruder.  Is that my neighbor's corpulent cat?   A stray dog?  My high school senior sneaking out of the house and crawling on all fours to reach freedom?  Nope!  It was a fox.  Yes!  A fat little grey fox just strolling around like she didn't have a single care in the world!  

Wow.  I was smiling from ear to ear in the dark and wondering if the fox could see me or if she even knew I was there!?  At this point, most might have hollered out a "shoo!" or something along those lines because who wants wild animals in their backyard?  *coughs and scrunches facial muscles into a curious look*  I might like to add that we have had a few bears wander through so I am beginning to think this place is the Wild Kingdom of Georgia.

Anyway!  I just watched her until I could not help it any longer.  I made a noise on purpose to see what would happen.  Death wish?  I don't think so.  After all, she was at least 10 feet away and probably not interested in eating me.  Right?   Can I get a witness?  Okay, so here is what happened next and the whole point of my long introduction and story:  she moved closer, looked directly at me and lay down in the grass.  Yes.  I had to blink and lean in to do a double-take and make sure I was not hallucinating.  There we were.  Two creatures sharing a moment in the moonlight.  

After a few minutes, I started talking in a super low voice.   I said something like, "Well, hello there," to which she replied, "……"  In case you don't understand fox, that was her way of saying hello in return.  I asked about her day; we discussed the cosmos and some interesting theories about physics and the whole meaning of life before I suggested it was bedtime and began to make my way out of the swing.  She watched me and never moved an inch.  

Can I say something here?  Yes, I have already said a lot but there is more!  That was a cool experience.  Of course, the fox didn't talk to me (if she had, I would have to admit myself to a mental institution) but we DID share some time in my yard and I DID speak casually to her as if she could understand me.  Surely, she heard me.  The interesting thing was she seemed to enjoy the company and must have had a sense of peace around me otherwise she would never have stayed for the universal lecture.    Gosh, I hope my neighbors don't have a collection of exotic pets that are people friendly.  Better check on that later.

I sigh happily as I write this because it has been a long, long time since I have felt like writing anything about anything not work related.  The experience reminded me that there is something really amazing about the connections we all share whether they are complex, informal, spontaneous or otherwise.   Even moments in the moonlight with a little friendly fox can inspire us to smile.

Life is good.

Soon
the summer winds will bring you back
I will watch for you and wait
In the grassy fields and
in the small spaces
of mystery you
fill.

Time
Passes and I know
I will hold you again
Our days will be spent
floating
and wandering the great abyss
together.

Daily
I count the number of times
I have seen you, felt you
a presence of sorts
that comforts me
It's you
Always there
Safe.

You
Are the spark of my imagination
The fire
and emotion
that swells and twists
deep within
my very soul.


Open
the gates and
meet me there
for I come at night
in the wind
To wake one day
Beside you.


Dedicated to my best friend who left this realm far too soon.
I wrote this for him.  He blew his brains out one night and life has not been the same since.

Death Be Not Proud  

Death be not proud, though some have called thee
Mighty and dreadfull, for, thou art not soe,
For, those, whom thou think'st, thou dost overthrow,
Die not, poore death, nor yet canst thou kill mee.
From rest and sleepe, which but thy pictures bee,
Much pleasure, then from thee, much more must flow,
And soonest our best men with thee doe goe,
Rest of their bones, and soules deliverie.
Thou art slave to Fate, Chance, kings, and desperate men,
And dost with poyson, warre, and sicknesse dwell,
And poppie, or charmes can make us sleepe as well,
And better then thy stroake; why swell'st thou then?
One short sleepe past, wee wake eternally,
And death shall be no more; death, thou shalt die.

John Donne



Every year that passes marks a private celebration.  2011 ... here we go! Love and happy wishes to all my good friends here on dA and a special hello and heartfelt thanks to my closest companions.  Having a hand to hold makes it easier to walk.  Thank you for being there.  Always.  The River runs deep.